Things that go bump in the night

"I do believe in spooks, I do believe in spooks, I do I do I do believe in spooks... " -- The Cowardly Lion

I have never seen a ghost. But I suspect they have seen me.

Tales of the unexplained are common in my side of the family. Between the lot of us, we've had covers and pillows tugged away in the night; we've seen orbs, and we've had lights that turn themselves on; objects have appeared in unexpected places or have moved without any visible cause. We've caught dark figures at the edge of sight, and one of us even had a horrifying encounter with a shadow man. At times, urgent rapping and banging sounds emanate from inside closed cabinets and from certain empty rooms. The events span decades, and have occurred in a number of houses in several states. The common denominator seems to be us: my mother, sister, brother and myself. And my kids have had a few odd experiences of their own. It would seem that we attract this kind of thing.

For the most part, I remain a fascinated observer of the paranormal field. Experiences come to me, but I don't go looking for them. It is tantalizing to think of an alternate reality just beyond our senses, but deliberately stepping into that reality feels like a bad idea.

So. Sometimes I think I'd like to see a ghost. Other times I remember to be careful what I wish for.

Nothing Gold Can Stay

Nature's first green is gold,
Her hardest hue to hold.
Her early leaf's a flower;
But only so an hour.
Then leaf subsides to leaf.
So Eden sank to grief,
So dawn goes down to day.
Nothing gold can stay. - Robert Frost

First frost is coming tonight. That's the turning point, you know. The night when the bravest flowers breathe their last and tree frog voices go silent. The leaves will begin to fall in earnest now, leaving only baren branches against the sky.

Time to crank up the furnace, put extra blankets on the beds, and hunker down for winter. Too soon by far, too soon.

Lights, cameras, magic

Tonight's the night! NBC's new reality show, Phenomenon, premiers at 8 PM, and I'm counting down the hours. Magicians of all stripes will take their best shots to become the Pharaoh of Phenomena, Prince of Prestidigitation, Sultan of the Old Switcheroo ... man, I love magic.

Yes, I know it's all illusion. And no, I most emphatically do NOT want to know how it's done.

The hosts are Uri Geller and Criss Angel. Geller wouldn't have been my first choice; his big signature trick is ::yawn:: spoon bending. But I do have a story about him:

Back in the 70's, when he first hit the TV scene, Geller would ask the TV audience to gather up broken watches and bring them to the TV set. He would then make heavy-concentration faces and do some fist clenching, then take calls about all the watches that were miraculously repaired.

Silly as that sounds, I gotta tell ya that during one such episode he "fixed" an old pocketwatch of my great grandfather's that hadn't ticked a tock in decades. Probably a coincidence, though. Right?

*Update, 10:10 PM. The show was a major disappointment. The promos promised illusion and amazement, but all we got was cheap mentalist crap and a couple of amateur bar tricks. The only thing that disappeared was a half hour of my life. So watch this, NBC: Poof. I'm gone.

Waging war: Blackwater

Call me naive. Clueless, even.

Whenever I heard the words "government contractors in Iraq," I pictured American civilian engineers working on water lines; bridge designers; city planners. Turns out, they're mercenaries -- soldiers for hire in privately owned, parallel armies that are operated for profit and funded by your tax dollars. The biggest of them is Blackwater.

Bill Moyers Journal guest this week is Jeremy Scahill, independent journalist and author of the new book, Blackwater: The Rise of the World's Most Powerful Mercenary Army. It's an eye-opening interview, and the link to the transcript is below. I highly recommend that you read it, or access the video from Bill Moyers Journal site.

Here are my own take-away items from the show:

So this is why there is no draft yet.

From my point of view, this is the good news. I have two draft-age sons, and my greatest fear when George Bush was reelected was that he would take my kids. We had a rapidly deteriorating and chaotic war; recruiters could could not meet their quotas; the National Guard was being deployed overseas; active duty soldiers were subjected to prolonged service and multiple deployments. At the same time, benefits for veterans were being cut. To me, that spelled an imminent draft. But only now are we hearing the first rumblings for "universal service."

Critics say that because there is no draft and the casualties among the contractors are not counted, the true cost of the war can be hidden from the public. I'm sure that's true, but when it comes to this, I am completely and unrepentantly selfish. God bless and protect the troops who have chosen to serve. But if hiring mercenaries in Iraq can keep more of our sons out of there, so be it.

Blackwater looks a lot like a kickback machine.

Branches of the military cannot contribute to political campaigns. People who own military contracting companies can. So who's first in line when the dollars are doled out? And exactly how much of the public money that politicians funnel to the contractors comes back as campaign contributions? I find those to be interesting questions.

The booty goes to whichever party holds the purse strings. The family behind Blackwater is staunchly Republican and right-wing, and makes heavy contributions to the party and its candidates. All nice and legal, of course, as politicians do make the laws. But it smells to high heaven.

Plus, contractors are employers of choice for ex-intelligence types and former office holders.

Add to it that Blackwater is usually the company providing security for our diplomats and politicians in really dangerous places, and you could see why few of our esteemed leaders would be enthused about launching any kind of investigation.

This can't be good for morale.

Payments to Blackwater per contractor are many times the pay of an enlisted service member. Blackwater's equipment and support is state of the art; troops' parents are running bake sales back home to buy the guys some body armor.

Worse, troops told Scahill that Iraqi civilians do not make a distinction between the army and private contractors. So, when contractors -- who are not accountable as the army is -- commit crimes or mayhem, it is often the enlisted troops who bear the casualties in retaliation attacks.

My, but that slope looks slippery.

In war, it seems, there are only bad choices and worse choices.

It appears that Blackwater and its brethren provide a needed service. In fact, according to military sources, there is no way America could sustain its effort in the Middle East without them. They seem to be the go-to guys for everything from staunching drug traffic in South America, to mob control in disasters like New Orleans, to corporate security off shore.

But here's the thing: If we privatize our military, and if that private army owns the government who pays it to operate, how much control do we as a nation have over our own war machine?

Links
* Transcript, Interview with Jeremy Scahill. Bill Moyers Journal, October 19 2007
* Jeremy Scahill on Blackwater
* Blackwater's Beginnings
* Blackwater: Rise of the World's Most Powerful Mercenary Army. Amazon.com

Revenge is sweet

News item: Woman, 75, fined for hammering Comcast office. Fed up with no-show technicians, permanent on-hold status and lousy service, one little old church-lady lost it. She marched into a Comcast office and went to work on their equipment with a hammer.

"I smashed a keyboard, knocked over a monitor ... and I went to hit the telephone," Shaw said. "I figured, 'Hey, my telephone is screwed up, so is yours.'"

I can relate.

After almost three weeks of Comcast internet connections that were sporadic at best, six phone calls, one missed (he came early) and two no-show technical appointments, we finally seem to have the problem resolved. For now.

For this, I'm paying $45.95 a month? Needless to say, I'm shopping around for a new carrier.

Take it away, Snowball

If you haven't seen this yet, you gotta. GOTTA, got it?



BTW, I'm having issues with Comcast again, so I may not be on much for a bit. Dang it.

Moonrise in Shadowland

The Round Robin Challenge this week is to capture the eerie and pensive mood of the season. Anything goes.

Inspired by a chapter on scanner art in a book about closeup photography, I decided to fire up the machine I got for my birthday and try my hand at that. Of dozens of shots, this is the best of the bunch.

The "moon" is actually a white stone, scanned in a dark room with the lid of the scanner open and one light source to the side. The "land" is a black T-shirt draped over the edge of the lid. I meant to go back and make a cleaner shot when time allowed, but you know how that goes.

My first thought was to try shrouding my head in black and scanning my face, eyes closed. I was going for a floating death mask Halloween thing. Man, was that a bad idea. (Ladies, if you really want a good scare, try this: Lay a mirror on a low table, bend over to see your reflection, and see what happens to your face.) You will never, never be seeing those shots. Ever.

Experiment B involved scanning a crystal ball paperweight. That turned out pretty well, producing kind of an alien planet effect:

















Interestingly enough, there is controversy over whether scanned images are actually photographs. I can see why serious photographers would have an issue. But if, like me, all you do is arrange the shot, fiddle with the light and settings, and push the button, then I don't see the difference. It's the same process for either machine. Either way, you end up with a digital image. Either way, it's a lot of fun.

To see what the other Robins found in their forays into Shadowland, please go to the main page and visit their blogs. You'll be glad you did!

*PS - These would have looked much better if I could have kept them long and thin, like the original images from the scanner platen, but they got squarish when rotated 90 degrees. If anyone knows how to preserve dimensions when rotating images, I'd appreciate your telling me how to do that.

Release your inner novelist

Isaac Asimov said, "If my doctor told me I had only six minutes to live, I wouldn't brood. I'd type a little faster."

You, however, are luckier. First of all, you probably have way more than six minutes to live. Plus, you have way more than six minutes to deadline: You have a whole month, to be precise. A whole, entire month, to write ::insert drum roll:: your very own novel! (Well, actually, it's more of a novella, but let's not get hung up on details.)

November is National Novel Writing Month, A.K.A. NaNoWriMo. Na No What-o?, you may ask. From the website:

National Novel Writing Month is a fun, seat-of-your-pants approach to novel writing. Participants begin writing November 1. The goal is to write a 175-page (50,000-word) novel by midnight, November 30.

Valuing enthusiasm and perseverance over painstaking craft, NaNoWriMo is a novel-writing program for everyone who has thought fleetingly about writing a novel but has been scared away by the time and effort involved.

Because of the limited writing window, the ONLY thing that matters in NaNoWriMo is output. It's all about quantity, not quality. The kamikaze approach forces you to lower your expectations, take risks, and write on the fly ... (click to continue.)

Thousands of writers around the world will spend November hunkered down over big, steaming piles of hasty prose, chugging caffeine and sharing the experience in online forums. Sounds like a good time to me.

If you want to play, be sure to sign up by October 31. There's a cool little logo thingy you can put on your blog for the month. And if you actually manage to hit the 50,000 word goal, you get bragging rights and a badge of honor. In other words, it's about the journey, not the destination. Really, isn't everything?

Sugar and spice

*Fair Warning: This is going to be a diabetes update. So if you hate listening to old people natter on about their health issues, now would be the time to make a run for it.

Forgive me, Body, for we have sinned. (Yes, we. This is, after all, mostly your fault.) It has been a month since my last confession. Since then, we have eaten any number of sweet things and carbs (though far fewer of them than we wanted). We had pizza twice and one big honkin' grinder that I still recall fondly. We gave in to the free latte and muffins at work last week. And we have again drifted away from regular testing, as we do not enjoy stabbing ourselves all that much. I am truly sorry, and I promise to resume testing and to stay away from the goodies. For your part, Body Dearest, you could try not to freak out when we backslide, OK? OK.

About the sugar

I finally went in for blood work in mid-September. My A1c was 7.7. For the uninitiated, normal is 4.0-6.0 and over 8.0 is big trouble. Measures of kidney function indicated "an elevated risk for diabetic neuropathy." Worse, it seems that if the sugar doesn't kill me, the cholesterol will. So now I need to work on that, too, and take Vytorin every day. The fun never ends.

Now, there are three main parts to lowering blood sugar: education, diet and ::shudder:: exercise. So I could (a.) read a lot and eat stuff or (b.) bounce around and sweat. I say Go with your strengths. That would be A. If that alone doesn't do the trick, I may actually have to join a gym. I'm not that desperate yet.

Here's the spice part

Following a bad experience with Avandamet, I have begun to pursue alternative and herbal options for controlling blood sugar.

There is a surprisingly long list of natural substances, spices and foods that are purported to work and that have been clinically tested for effectiveness, side effects and interactions. Prevention Magazine has one or another "diabetes cure" every issue, so it's a good place to start for ideas. One source I found particularly useful for followup is Alternative Cures That Really Work, by Ronald Hoffman, MD and Barry Fox, PhD. The book ranks each item for effectiveness, one to five stars. It also summarizes the studies done on the substances, gives dosages, and lists side effects and drug interactions.

Among the most familiar and accessible alternatives is cinnamon. I already had that in the pantry, and I like it, so that's where I started.

USDA studies have found that the water soluble components of cinnamon significantly reduce both blood sugars and cholesterol. It can be taken as ground spice or made into a tea. A quarter teaspoon of the ground spice is effective, but anything over half a teaspoon can be toxic over time.

Also on the lists of proven sugar and cholesterol regulators are oats and walnuts. So, every day for a month now my breakfast has consisted of oatmeal with the quarter teaspoon of cinnamon, an ounce of chopped walnuts, a few raisins for sweetness (only 5 or 6 - they're sugary)and low fat milk.

I really think this new breakfast regimen has helped. My morning testing levels are in the mid-140s now; that's still too high, but it's down significantly from 160s a month ago and 200s the month before that.

I am eating healthier overall, I make an effort to be more active, and I still take the metformin, so the "foodaceuticles" are obviously not the only factor in the lower numbers. Still, I'll take all the help I can get.

I'd also love to try prickly pear cactus, which is supposed to be extremely effective, but it is damned hard to come by in Indiana. Believe me, I've looked. Failing that, I may try adding fenugreek, another spice that scores well.

Mind you, I have run all this past my doctor. He has had training in herbal medicine and is sympathetic to my experiments, as long as I'm still taking prescribed meds too. Our goal is to reduce the amount of medication I need, not to replace it.

I suspect that a lot of what alternative treatments do is to give back a sense of control to the patient; they may work primarily by placebo effect. I'm OK with that. I'll take it over Avandia any day.

Links you might like
* Herbs, Vitamins, and More for Diabetes, WebMD
* Cinnamon May Help Treat Diabetes, CBS News
* Diabetes Mine (great blog)

Enter if you dare

Next topic up at Round Robins is Shadowland:

October. Darkness reigns and spirits gather. Gone are the sunlit days of summer, and the heart turns strange and melancholy. Welcome to Shadowland.

The theme is open-ended, so go with whatever your imagination can conjure. Photograph actual shadows, perhaps; capture the mood in a striking portrait or landscape, or even -- if you dare -- catch a ghost. This would be a great time to try working in black and white or to experiment with editing and effects. After all, it's Shadowland. Anything could happen.

To play with us, just visit the Round Robin home page and sign up per the instructions there, and post your entry on October 20. Newcomers are warmly welcomed, so don't be shy. I hope to see you there!

*The photo above is a reflection in a garden gazing ball. Did you guess?

Invasion of the sod people

OK, OK. So I cheated. A little.

The Round Robin challenge last time was Backyard Photography. I tried to use the back yard, I really did, but five minutes into the project the tears started falling, so I left. Tammie Jean included a loophole of sorts with the "or a local park" phrase, so I went with the commons area out front. Sorry if I ticked anyone off.

Here's the long, sad story: We live on city-size lots in a suburb. However, this development was carved out of the private estate of someone who loved, collected, and preserved trees, and the developer saved every one he possibly could. We're talking oaks a hundred to two hundred years old, rare shag bark hickories, mature maples -- ancient, hardwood forest. I was in love with every one of them.

When we moved here almost twenty years ago, the yards were so heavily wooded that we could barely see the houses immediately around us. Being in the back yard was like going camping. It was secluded, cool, infinitely relaxing. There were mossy stones and a dozen varieties of wild flowers; we had lady slipper, jack in the pulpit, trout lilies, and violets in purple and white. A dense ground cover filled the shallow valley that runs between the properties in back. It bloomed yellow in spring, a wide golden river meandering off into the shadowy woods. Squirrels raised families here, chipmunks sunned on the deck railing. There were baby rabbits in the spring, and gardening turned up the occasional turtle and toad. Native songbirds jostled for a turn at the feeders. To me, it was paradise.

Over time, we inevitably lost trees to age, disease and storms. A tornado came through a few years ago and took down many more. Sad as that was, I could reconcile myself to it as nature's way. But in the last two years, new neighbors have moved in behind and to the side of us, and between them they have taken down at least 40 trees, great and small. They cut off all the low branches on the few survivors, branches that formed the deep green views from my windows; I can now see into neighbors' rooms, and I assume they can look into mine. They poisoned all the wildflowers, dug up the ground cover, and rolled out plain, green sod penned in by new split rail fences. The forest is gone, the wildlife has fled, and there is no privacy whatsoever.

I can't tell you how deeply it has hurt me to see those grand old trees dying and not to be able to do a thing about it. It has literally sickened me to wake to the sound of chain saws and wood chippers, to fly to the window to see which ones are being killed this time ... to feel the house shake as massive sections of trunks fall to the ground ... to know that it's all being taken away forever. On those days, I have to leave the house, or I'll spend the whole day bawling like a baby. It is more despair and powerlessness and grief than I can bear.

So. That's why I can't photograph my back yard. It just hurts too much to look at it.

Where the sidewalk ends

It's Round Robin time again, and the topic du jour is Backyard Photography, from Tammie Jean of Long Drives to Nowhere: "What I like best about backyard photography (or photography at the local park) is that you don't have to go very far to get great shots - there are plenty of opportunities right there in front of you."

So here ya go: a foggy October morning here in the neighborhood, on the path between the parking lot and the soccer field. This is part of the recreation complex for the development, more or less across the street from us. Which would make it literally "right there in front of me," huh?

I haven't been through that little path in years, and I was surprised at how much it's grown over since then. And I don't recall ever strolling around the neighborhood in the fog at 6:30 AM before today. It's amazing what this little photo challenge can get a person to do and see. Thanks, Tammie Jean, for the topic!

To see all the Round Robin entries, click here -- and join us next time, OK?

A hobby is born

Behold my first effort in bead craft. It's river jasper, and the pendant is a real carob leaf plated with copper. OK, it's not the crown jewels, but it's a beginning.

The bead shop is in an old house, and the windows are filled with colorful and exotic things. The rooms are bursting with every kind of stone, glass, wooden and bone bead, along with everything needed to turn them into wearable whatevers. Cards above the bins tell the lore of each stone in hand-done calligraphy. (This is trouble, as I am a complete sucker for a story.) Interspersed with the beads are intriguing, New-Age-y items like singing bowls and crystals.

My first time in the shop was a week ago, a rare day off that was all mine to spend. I sorted and sifted the goodies for a half hour or so, striking up an acquaintance with Doug, the owner. Doug is about 60, I'd say, with laugh lines, twinkly eyes and sparse grey hair. He sits under a sign put up by his wife: "Doug is hard of hearing. Feel free to yell at him. I do it all the time." I like her already.

Before long, Doug had me seated in a sunny room stringing a bowlful of beads and wondering why I never tried this before. The process is strangely relaxing. There is the beauty of the material, the smoothness of the beads and wire. The work falls quickly into a rhythm, hypnotic and calming. Doug says that ancient words for beading were synonymous with meditation. All I know is that it was the best morning I've had in years. And when it was done, I wore something that spoke to me of that fine, clear autumn day.

Next time: jade. I love jade.

October holidays

October's poplars are flaming torches lighting the way to winter. - Nova Bair

Ah, October. What September started, this month will finish. Leaves are turning in earnest, and the weatherman is forecasting frost. Time to haul the sweaters out of the cedar chest, to try on last year's coats and boots before the snow flies.

October is named for the eighth month of the Roman calendar. It is the tenth month of the Japanese lunar calendar, where it is called Kannazuki, "the month when there are no gods." Legend has it that the eight million gods of Japan leave their shrines in October and convene at the grand shrine of Izumu Taisha to discuss the state of the world. (I guess the best you can do if you need one is to leave a message.)

This is the month of the Full Hunters' Moon, and its birthstone is opal -- a stone said to be mysterious and powerful, but also unlucky for any but those born in October.

October is Diabetes Awareness Month, a subject close to my own heart. It is also Adopt a Shelter Dog Month, International Drum Month, and National Popcorn Popping Month. And Oktoberfest is in full swing.

Interesting holidays are a bit thin on the ground this month, but Halloween makes up for that, lasting all month as it does these days. However, there are a few worth mentioning: October 2 is Name Your Car Day. (I think I'll call mine Martha. It's a minivan.) October 6 is Mad Hatter Day, when we're allowed to admit that we are all completely nuts. The 11th is Take Your Teddy Bear to Work Day, which may or may not be a great idea, depending on your office culture and career goals. If the bear thing goes badly, you can recoup your losses on the 16th with a nice suck-up present for Bosses Day. On the other hand, if you got away with having a teddy bear in your cubicle, you can probably pull off Wear Something Gaudy Day on October 17.

Sweetest Day is becoming mainstream, but I gotta say I don't get it. I mean, don't we have Valentine's Day for that? But hey, if you want it, go for it. It's October 21. Ditto for Mother in Laws' Day, October 28, which is a rerun of Mothers' Day if you did that one right. If you blew Mothers' Day, this is your chance to grovel your way back into a Mom's good graces.

All of which, of course, pales in comparison with the blow out, big-finish death fest on October 31, AKA Halloween. After which, it is officially time to get going on Christmas, the big mack daddy of all holidays. Now that's scary.